On Sunday I interviewed my parents about what they went through to adopt me. They shared how they were just beginning the adoption process when a mysterious phone call changed their lives forever.
Please feel free to leave questions or comments. We have already received a few and we will do our best to answer all of them!
You’re invited to join us as we celebrate adoption day and 27 years of being together Sunday May 30th at 7:00pm on our Facebook Fan Page.
We’ll be broadcasting from our home in New Hampshire and sharing our memories and thoughts on adoption. We will be sharing our memories, talking about larger adoption issues and answering your questions.
Details here: http://bit.ly/apGybN
We will have some major announcements about the book soon. Join our journey and we’ll keep you updated with the latest news. http://eepurl.com/mlQr
Its been quiet on the blog recently, but there has been a lot going on behind the scenes. We are making progress with the book. I can’t say anything right now, but we may have some major announcements in the coming months.
As we move closer to publication, we invite you to be part of our journey by joining our monthly newsletter. Every month we will be sharing our thoughts and experiences about our story as well as updating you about news, special events and the book.
Thank you so much for all of your support. It means a lot to us. If you have any questions or problems feel free to email Nelson/Roberto at: dewittn@anasmiracle.com
If you are unable to see the video click here.
Yesterday, 12 years ago our family was reunited for the first time. It was an incredible experience and to celebrate we did an online video and chat. It was a lot of fun and it was great to hear everyone share their experiences.
For those of you who could not stay for the entire show, or were unable to join us, we recorded the whole thing. It is about 2 hours long but I bookmarked each section to make it easier for people to watch in parts.
We would love to hear your thoughts and feedback because we are thinking about doing it again.
This Sunday, December 20th it will be 12 years since our family was reunited. To celebrate we are inviting you to join us in a live video chat from Panama. Starting at 6:30pm we will be answering any questions you might have about the story or our experiences. This is a chance for you to meet some of the “characters” from my mother’s upcoming book.
You can join the conversation by going to http://www.anasmiracle.com/the-story/live or on our Facebook Page. You can RSVP here. Hope to see you there!
This past Tuesday night I was on a conference call with Sidney Gaskins and Kevin Hofmann. The call was about how to approach the search as a parent and as an adoptee. Sidney is a mother of an adopted child and shared how she approaches the subject with her 10 year old son. Kevin is an adoptee who recently started searching for his birth family again. It was a great conversation. I would like to thank Sidney for putting this together and Kevin for sharing his thoughts and feelings.
Here are some of the topics we talked about:
We hope this information will be useful for adoptees and parents who are wondering how to approach this sensitive subject. We would love to hear any feedback people have about this conversation.
You can also call in and listen to this interview over the phone:
Playback Dial-in Number: 1-218-936-7995 (Midwest)
Playback Access Code: 107559
Last Wednesday my mother and I were at Wellesley College talking to a group of students. We were talking about the adoption story, her book and my experiences meeting my family.
They were a great group of students and we had a fun time talking with them.
Below is a video recording we did of the event. I did remember to press record this time. However, the audio quality is not great. You will have to turn up the volume, but you should be able to hear everything. The video is about an hour long. We talk for the first 45 minutes and answer questions for the remainder.
I have been looking into a mic and will be getting one soon. That should make future recordings much better.
If you can’t see the video above, click here.
As always we would love to hear from you. Question or comments are welcome on the website or Facebook page.
This is a reminder that Wednesday at 5pm my mother and I will be talking about the adoption story and our passions at Wellesley College. We are planning to broadcast live over the web. I hope you all can join us!
You can RSVP for the event here (even if you are joining us online).
Here is the link where you can watch!
If you can’t see the video above click here.
I’ve been asked this question a lot recently: “How do I talk to my adoptive parents about looking for my birth parents?”
Obviously this is a sensitive subject and I do my best to give advice based on my experiences. Keep in mind, I never had this talk with my parents. Even though I wasn’t proactive about this, at the time there are things I did that really helped.
1) Treat them the same – This is probably the easiest thing to do and the most imporant. I think that adoptive parents’ biggest fear is that they are going to lose you; that by finding your birth family, you are going to stop being part of their lives. Everyone who has asked me this question was really aware of this and didn’t want to hurt their adoptive parents. I think by doing the same things as you always do with your adoptive parents they can get over their fear and realize you aren’t going anywhere.
2) Include them – Some parents are more open about this than others, but the more they are a part of the search the easier it might be to deal with. I think a big part of my family getting over its fears was that they went with me and met this new family. As time went on, my adoptive parents got to know them more and it was a lot easier for them.
I also wanted to say something to the adoptive parents out there.
Try to understand this is not about you as parents. You are so important to your adopted child and they don’t want to hurt you. As an adoptee, looking for your birth parents is part of figuring out who you are as a person. I think it’s human nature to resolve unanswered questions, such as where did I come from?
Good luck with your search and if there is anything I can do, or if you have other questions, please feel free to contact me. dewittn@anasmiracle.com
The other weekend I was visiting my parents and I was able to sit down with my mother and talk about the book. We talked about the research that went into it and how she spent time with my birth family trying to piece together the story.
If you can’t see the video above click here.
Originally it was going to be a project for both my mother and father, but they quickly realized that someone had to take full responsibility. In 2002 my mother was finishing up another book she was working on and she decided that it was a great opportunity to start.
In 2004 she got serious about starting the book and began by taking Spanish classes. She knew she would have to have difficult conversations with my family and it would be best to do those in Spanish. My mother and brother both took classes in Costa Rica to help improve her Spanish language skills.
In late 2005 she was at a point where her Spanish was good enough to start interviewing people. She spent a couple of weeks living with members of my birth mother and birth father’s families. During this time there was a lot of opportunity for conversation and to dig a little deeper. They started to remember a lot of details that we did not know before, and helped piece together the story. They also helped her dig up old newspapers which provided a context for our story.
We talked about the repression of memory and how we learned a lot of new information very quickly. My mother talks about how her own records reminded her about pieces of the story she had forgotten.
She really wanted people to be a part of the journey we experienced. To go from not knowing, to putting the pieces back together.
My mother and I had been talking about the power of social networks and how it relates to the book. I thought it would be neat if people could come back to the Facebook group and leave their thoughts about her work. She would love to hear what people think about it and so would I. You can also leave a comment on this post. Hope to hear from you!